PLAY TIME: Karl Lagerfeld might soon add another accomplishment to his already astounding résumé: playwright. The designer and his muse, Amanda Harlech, have decided to start putting their flare for witty repartee to paper. The play would poke fun at the art world, with a few barbs directed at the fashion folk who orbit it. “I don’t want to become a writer,” Lagerfeld said. “It’s a game, for fun, but I like the idea.”

COCO NUTS: Diminutive pop diva Kylie Minogue tried to avoid as much of the paparazzi crush as possible at Tuesday’s Chanel couture show by hanging out backstage with Karl Lagerfeld — even hanging off his neck for a moment — until minutes before the show began. Still, Minogue had plenty to discuss with the designer, who has agreed to design what she called a “dreamy” dress for her upcoming “Showgirl” tour, which begins in March. “I met with him on Monday — as he was preparing for all this,” she said. “He kept very cool. He’s amazing to be able to do it all.” Minogue added that John Galliano will also whip up a dress for her. On the other side of the aisle, actress Anna Mouglalis said she’s in the early stages of recording an album. But the gravelly voiced beauty wasn’t the only one in the room with musical aspirations. Theodora Richards, rock royalty as Keith Richards’ daughter, said she wanted to become an actress — who can also sing and dance. “It is in my blood,” she quipped. In the meantime, Richards, 19, is keeping busy by guest editing the March issue of French fashion magazine Jalouse.

BOWS AND ARROWS: Good thing Yves Saint Laurent didn’t decide to become a fashion critic in his retirement. Asked if he’s been paying attention to this week’s couture shows, he replied: “Everything I’ve seen is awful.” But he is still a big fan of his longtime collaborator Loulou de la Falaise and joined her Tuesday night to fete her new boutique on Rue Cambon. “I’m always there for her,” he said. And so were all the other tight-knit members of the Saint Laurent tribe, including Pierre Bergé and Betty Catroux. Hors d’oeuvres galore were circling, but there were no takers in this crowd. Saint Laurent had a good reason. “I’m on a diet,” he said.

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