The ACM Awards brought out the cowboy boots, bedazzlements and statement suits — with little to no success.
Reba McEntire: B
Once you go into country music, the rules go out the door. McEntire’s floor-length flapper dress paired with silvery cowboy boots and statement jewelry is another day at the office around these parts — when in reality, it would be fashion purgatory. But in context, it fits the occasion.
Kacey Musgraves: C
This pantsuit is basically Abba-disco-costume-meets-psychedelic-seahorse. Even on a country music scale, this is terrible. The Morticia Addams hair isn’t helping matters.
Maren Morris: D
When a mullet dress meets a scrunchie. Also, the intense self-tanner and white nails take this further into Jersey Shore prom dress territory.
Miranda Lambert: C-
The slime green color of this dress gives the impression that she arrived from outer space via the egg-shaped clutch she’s carrying.
Carrie Underwood: D
The outfit and glam feel very desperate. But if you shortened the hem and added a bedazzled tiara, she’d be the ideal candidate for an Eastern Bloc ice skating competition.
Dennis Quaid: D
Behold! This is what a midlife crisis looks like. The biker jacket, skintight jeans and “Bad Boy” T-shirt are just depressing. However, the medieval troubadour shiny shoes intrigue us.
Luke Bryan: C-
C-3PO called and would like his look back. A gold lamé blazer feels much better suited for a glam rocker. He should be more subtle with his watch deal.
Brothers Osborne: D+
This is like when you agree to go to a costume party as a group but your friend chickens out at the last minute and you’re left looking like the inside of a piñata. The Manuel Cuevas-style suits are best left to Conway Twitty.